Wednesday, August 14, 2019

Freefalling through time

I have understood the theory of relativity in a fragmented way at best, without grasping any core unifying concepts very firmly.

One part of my mental model, based on what I think I understand to be one of those slippery core concepts it this;  we are free-falling through time.  I felt connected to that core concept as I walked through the huge parking lot and then drove away on the last day of my first career.

I had numerous reasons for deciding when to retire.  I distrust the resilience of a plan shaped by a only a small set of reasons.
  • TL;DR - I retired because I wanted feed the flash-fires of my passions and see what happened. It was time to try time sky-diving.
  • I had a desire to be more available to help people that I know and people similar to the people I know, and the people that I don’t know yet. 
  • I wanted to chase down some of the many streams of fiction and nonfiction content that had zipped past me as I tried to stay in the “heads down” posture that was essential to earning a living.
  • I wanted to free fall through immersive electronic games, including MMORPGs, 4X games, and surreal puzzlers that my sons and friends had enjoyed. 
  • I could see in myself and men I am related to a tendency toward becoming a hermit and then a weird hermit.  If I waited too late to develop social skills that were useful outside of the work environment, I might be at greater risk for that.
  • The electrical and computer engineering degree I had achieved many years before seemed neglected like a set of favorite toys on a dusty shelf.  I wanted to use the parts of those skills that my employer didn’t care to fund.
  • I felt that my apparent lack of career ambitions, even after 35 years (other than “not become a super villain”, of course) didn’t completely describe me.  I had actually too many ambitions to count but they were flash fires of interest.  They had been distractions in the context of keeping the financial health that I had stumbled into achieving.  Now I very much wanted to watch some of those develop.  To watch the flames and see what happened if they were fueled by the time and resources I might choose to invest in them.

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